Posts Tagged ‘gdp’

Marijuana Jokes

So, we found a list of Marijuana jokes. I know some of our loyal patients would love this list, so I’m putting it on our blog for everyone to read. Enjoy! And leave your own jokes in the comment section!

Q: Why is the roach clip called a roach clip?
A: Because pot holder was taken
Q: How do you get a one-armed stoner out of a tree?
A: Wave.
Q: What do you get when you eat marijuana ?
A: A pot belly
Q: What do you call a pot smoker with two spliffs?
A: Double jointed.
Q: How do you know when you have smoked enough pot ?
A: When you start looking around for the directions on how to use the lighter.
Q: How do you know your a pothead?
A: You studied five days for a urine test?
Q: What do you call a pothead that doesn’t inhale?
A: Mr. President.
Q: What’s the point of a weed wacker?
A: Weed wackers need to wack it too!
Q: How do fish party ?
A: Seaweed.
Q: Why did the pot head plant cheerios?
A: He thought they were donut seeds.
Q: What do you call a person who remembers what they did at woodstock ?
A: A Liar.
Q: What do you call one bowl between three tokers ?
A: Malnutrition.
Q: What do you call it when a roach ash burns your shirt?
A: A pot hole!
Q: How do you know you are a true stoner?
A: When your bong gets washed more than your dishes!
Q: What is Reality?
A: An illusion caused by a lack of good weed.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk guy and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green! A stoner called the fire department and said, “Come quick my house is on fire!” The Fireman asked “How do we get there?” The stoner says “DUH, in a big red truck!”
Q: How many potheads does it take to change a lightbulb.
A: Screw it, we got lighters
Q. How long does it take before a pound of bud goes bad?
A. I don’t know! I’ve never had it longer than an hour!
Q: How do you hide pot from a hippie?
A: Put it in his work boots.
Q: What is the difference between politicians and stoners ?
A: Politicians don’t inhale…they just suck.
Q. What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend?
A. Homeless.
Q. What’s the difference between a stoner and a tweeker?
A. When a pothead is driving down a road he is driving about 20 mph and eating the upholstery. When a tweeker is driving down a road he is driving about 200 mph, and talking to the upholstery.
Q. If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving?
A. The cop!
Q. Why did the stoner cross the street?
A. His dealer lived on the other side.
Q: What do a bad football team and a pothead have in common?
A: They both get blitzed!
Q: How do you hide money from a hippie?
A: Put it under the soap.
Q: How many Stoners does it take to change a light bulb
A: Who cares man, its to bright in here anyway!
Q: How did the pothead burn his ear?
A: He answered the phone while ironing his clothes
Q. How do you get an one-armed hippie out of a tree?

Marijuana Allergies May Be More Common Than Thought

Marijuana hypersensitivity might be more common than previously thought, according to the results of a case series.

Though there are only a few case reports in the literature, “Marijuana allergy, I think, is fairly common,” said lead investigator Dr. Gordon Sussman, acting division director of clinical allergy and immunology at the University of Toronto. Even so, “It’s something physicians don’t really generally ask about. People should consider it in the diagnosis of rhinitis [and other allergic symptoms], and even in people that have asthma and anaphylaxis.”

The 17 patients who were included in the series reported that marijuana gave them runny noses or other problems; all ended up having positive marijuana skin prick test results, he reported. One patient in the series had an anaphylactic reaction after drinking marijuana tea.

That was the first patient in whom Dr. Sussman diagnosed a marijuana allergy. “I asked him in a detailed history what it could have been, and he actually had drunk marijuana tea. We knew at that point he had an IgE-mediated reaction to marijuana,” he said.

Curiosity piqued, and Dr. Sussman began asking allergy patients about marijuana use and reactions. A significant percentage reported symptoms from both contact and inhalation.

To confirm the diagnosis, he and his colleagues did skin-prick tests on the 17 patients between 21 and 58 years old, mostly men. They extracted buds or flowers in 5 mL of water for 15 minutes and pricked beneath drops placed on patients’ skin.

After 15 minutes, the 17 patients had wheals of 4-19 mm and surrounding flares. Fifteen presented with inhalation symptoms, including rhinitis and conjunctivitis, periorbital angioedema, wheezing, sinusitis, and throat swelling. Thirteen also reported hives from contact.

The anaphylaxis patient presented with anxiety, chest tightness, wheezing, GI cramping, and vomiting after drinking the tea.

“I don’t think it’s a contaminant; I’m pretty sure it’s an allergen in the marijuana they are reacting to,” Dr. Sussman said, adding that such reactions shouldn’t be a surprise because “marijuana is a weed, and weeds are generally known to be allergenic.”

Asking about marijuana use and past reactions should be a routine part of allergy work-ups, especially with expanding medical marijuana use. “People could actually be sensitized to marijuana and have a serious reaction. It’s important for people to recognize this,” Dr. Sussman said.

The researchers’ next step is to identify the actual allergens responsible for the reactions using a marijuana extract from a U.S. federal laboratory, serum from positive patients, and Western blot assays.

There was no outside funding for the study. Dr. Sussman said he had no disclosures.

http://medicalmarijuana411.com/mmj411_v3/?p=8594

Did You Know This About Marijuana?

 

Up in Smoke: Can Marijuana Users Pack Heat?

It’s an only-in-America, constitutional mash-up: gun rights and medical marijuana on the same bill!

That’s right, an Oregon case tackles an issue that, we suppose, had to be addressed at some point: Can medical marijuana users carry concealed guns?

Here’s the story, courtesy of AP.

Cynthia Wills, 54, has a medical marijuana permit to treat arthritis and muscle spasms. She also has a permit to carry a concealed handgun.

Oregon police, AP reports, have tried to take away Willis’s gun, prompting Willis to fire back with a lawsuit, joined by three co-plaintiffs. The case is pending in the Oregon Supreme Court.

“Under the medical marijuana law, I am supposed to be treated as any other citizen in this state,” said Willis, a retired school bus driver whose gun of choice is a Walther P-22. “If people don’t stand up for their little rights, all their big rights will be gone.”

State sheriffs, according to AP, say that federal gun laws prohibit firearm sales to drug addicts, a term that includes medical marijuana users, they contend.

“The whole medical marijuana issue is a concern to sheriffs across the country . . . because there is so much potential for abuse or for misuse and as a cover for organized criminal activity,” Washington County Sheriff Rob Gordon told AP.

Gordon’s office rejected three medical marijuana patients in the Portland suburbs who applied for concealed handgun permits.

If Willis loses, she plans to carry her pistol out in the open, in a holster on her hip, which is legal under Oregon law, according to AP.

“I’ve been done harm in my life and it won’t ever happen again,” she said, explaining why she carries a gun.

Could Medical Marijuana Get the Al Capone Treatment?

(Forbes.com 3/30/11) Could the IRS use the tax code to shut down medical marijuana dispensaries?

In 1931, mobster Al Capone was finally put behind bars because he was convicted of multiple tax-evasion charges, and the IRS is taking a similar approach with medical marijuana today. Many dispensaries in California now face audits that could result in their owing millions of dollars in back taxes.

According to Forbes columnist Robert W. Wood, the agency is relying on Internal Revenue Code Section 280E, which “precludes deductions for any business trafficking in controlled substances.” While dispensaries are legal in some states, including California, marijuana trafficking remains illegal on a federal level. The IRS is arguing that normal business expenses that most companies can deduct on their taxes are not applicable to dispensaries.

The Marin Alliance for Medical Marijuana in Fairfax, Calif., was the first dispensary to be hit with this ruling earlier this month. Founder Lynette Shaw told the Marin Independent Journal of California that the IRS audited the company’s returns for 2008 and 2009 and disallowed all of the alliance’s business deductions such as buying marijuana, hiring employees, and renting office space. Shaw did not disclose the amount the IRS told her she owes, but she described it as “a staggering sum” totaling several million dollars.

“Every dispensary in the nation, past, present and future is dead if this is upheld,” Shaw said. An IRS spokesperson declined to discuss the case. Shaw is currently planning an appeal.

According to a report from The American Independent, at least 12 dispensaries in California are currently being audited by the IRS.

As columnist Wood points out, the law isn’t completely clear. A previous tax court ruling allowed dispensaries to deduct expenses for activities not directly related to dispensing marijuana, such as caregiving, counseling, education and advocacy.

Allen St. Pierre, executive director of the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML), told The American Independent that the immaturity of the medical marijuana industry could have opened the door for these audits, since dispensaries are trying to take normal business deductions while also asking for special treatment for their product’s medicinal value.

“Not many people show up in the newspapers screaming that they make millions of dollars and don’t want to pay taxes,” said St. Pierre.

(http://blogs.forbes.com/eco-nomics/2011/03/28/could-medical-marijuana-get-the-al-capone-treatment/)

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